The Tower. Endless. wave 1350 and Ma ...

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Dearest Ethel,
If you are reading this, then Death exists but for us and us alone. Our most potent defense has failed to produce the desired results. Many of the orcs have developed some sort of immunity to the mushrooms' deleveling effect and remain as invincible as their shroom-free kin. After days of play fighting and slap tickling, an occasional orc will expire from boredom if his brethren box him in too long, but in lesser concentrations, this certainly cannot be relied on to stop the horde. Orcish feet are much too happy to remain content and still without great pressure. I shouldn't have taken this posting at the Endless Tower, you were right. I'm rich. Lord, am I rich. The orcs will never reach the portal, so in that way I've done my duty, but the price is my sanity. If I can still die, if this isn't all some post-life hell, then going for a morning lap in the lava pool will cure me of this world where the orcs must die too, but they don't.
-Your Warmage Forever,
XXX
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And so the great accountant in the sky tallied young XXX's Endless Tower deeds and wrote them thusly:
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